Ana Marie Ort

Need some inspiration for this next week? Here are a few blog posts which I’ve found motivating, and want to apply to my life:

Are You Making Something?

Motion vs. Momentum

The Shocking Guide to Incredible Productivity

Now, let’s actually do things worth doing!

I lift up my eyes to the hills.
From where does my help come?
My help comes from the Lord,
who made heaven and earth.

He will not let your foot be moved;
he who keeps you will not slumber.
Behold, he who keeps Israel
will neither slumber nor sleep.

The Lord is your keeper;
the Lord is your shade on your right hand.
The sun shall not strike you by day,
nor the moon by night.

The Lord will keep you from all evil;
he will keep your life.
The Lord will keep
your going out and your coming in
from this time forth and forevermore.

Up from the ground and what lies all around me…I look. I look up. I take my eyes off of that which seems so real and fix them on that which really is. What lies on the ground around my feet…what I hold with my hands…what I pursue with my plans…what I am setting my stride to accomplish…what happens without my influence…it all is here and now. But I am not merely a “here and now” person. I was made for something greater. I was made to bring glory to the One Who transcends time. Yes, He cares about the here and now, but His purposes are far greater than what I can see. He has eternity planned out. I am as a speck of dust without any significance, and all that I face really has no significance…except…He made it all. So, it does have significance. But what?

Still, I gaze up from my circumstances which seem so real…to that which really is. He is. Before there was time, He was. While time exists, He transcends it. From eternity past to eternity future, He will never change. He’ll always remain the same wise God Who never failed at anything…not even my life. Help never came from within me. So why should I expect it now? Help comes from above. The only One Who ever has the power to help at all offers help freely to His children. But why? Why would someone so frail as me earn the assistance of a Being Who never failed at anything? Because He loves me. But why me? Why not the person who doesn’t look up to Him? Such questions should cause me all the more to bow my heart in adoration to the One Who holds all my cells in their place..to the One Who guides each of my steps though I’m not aware of it…to the One Who offers help without my merit.

But why hills? Why is my view now filled with them? No doubt the King of the Universe wants me to keep in mind that He reigns over all. Even those who do not acknowledge His rule are His subjects. His entire purpose is to make His name great and to establish a perfect kingdom wherein His sovereign rule is acknowledged as what it really is. His glory is the climax of all of history, and it is only in realizing this that I will be able to head in the right direction. His city will never be destroyed. His reign will never be overthrown. And if He can accomplish all of this, surely He can keep my life on track.

My help comes directly from the maker of heaven and earth. He doesn’t relegate my needs to some lowly servant to tend to. No, He personally involves Himself with my cares. He is intimately acquainted with all my ways. None knows them as well as He. None knows my weakness as deeply and truly as He does. That the One Who has nations and armies at His command would care for me–a speck of dust with no significance, is enough to secure my never-ending devotion, trust, and fear. Devotion, in that I continually seek how I may know Him. Trust, in that I do not worry about anything because I know He controls it all. Fear, in that I shrink from even the slightest rebellion of my heart toward Him because I hate bringing pain to the One Who gave His life that I might live.

What does God’s help look like? It cannot be compared to earthly help. It is a divine service that cannot be duplicated by mere men.

He doesn’t allow me to fall forever. Though I may trip over my own feet or stumble over a providential bump in the path, He always sets my feet upon a rock. He doesn’t leave me to find my own way up. He picks me up and sets me up to walk again. And He does this over and over and over again. When I sin and repent, He forgives over and over and over again. Without fail. Furthermore, no fall is too great that He cannot set me on the path again. He will. He always will. None of His sheep get lost. He always finds them when they wander. His record at keeping sheep is untarnished. There’s no safer place to fall than in His fold.

I grow weary. I need sleep. But the Shepherd stays awake. He watches diligently that I am not harmed. Nothing goes past Him unnoticed. Even while I dream about fulfilling some selfish want, He plans how He will redeem me again. And even before I start into the slough of despond, He plans how He will pull me out. Nothing, absolutely nothing–not even my own selfish wants–will keep me from His best for me. He is too great to be thwarted by little me–a speck of dust and foolish sheep.

He keeps me. None can take me from His hand. No tribulation, peril, or sword is strong enough. I am not even strong enough to leave. How comforting this is. When I wonder if I could fall from grace, He is gracious to remind me that my trust is in Him, not myself. And if He saved me, then He surely will keep me. Oh what a wonderful God He is!

He is right there to comfort me and give me rest. In the midst of life’s toils, I need seek no further for refreshment than the shade He provides. He is always there by my side to provide strength and sustenance. He is there to give me relief from the harsh blaze of the noonday sun. At night, He is my light. The trials I face are always easier when I’m covered with His wings.

He will keep me from all evil. Not just some evil. Not just the evil that I notice. Not just the evil that I fight against first. But all evil. What a comfort! My preservation in righteousness is not dependent on my faithfulness but on His faithfulness. He will keep my life. There is no one else who could make such a promise. But God can because He is my Maker and rescuer from eternal fire. And thus, He is fully committed to bringing me safe to the other side of these tumultuous waters.

The Lord will keep me in all my ways. Whether I am at home or abroad, He will keep me in His will. He has every step ordained for me. Though I exercise the wisdom He gives me to decide what I will do with any given moment, ultimately it is He Who determines my steps. How comforting and strengthening it is to know that I can do nothing if He doesn’t ordain it. And I can go nowhere without Him taking me there. Therefore, I can confidently go in the direction of my dreams, knowing that the God Who placed those desires in my heart will be faithful to guide me every step of the way. He will bring about His plan for my life, and I don’t have to worry that He will make a mistake. Because He won’t.

Never in history has my God failed. Never in eternity will He lose one battle. Never in forever will He fall short of one thing that He sets out to accomplish. This is the God Who holds me in His hand. This is the God Who guides me with His eye. This is the God Who covers me with His wings. What have I to fear? Absolutely nothing. Because my help comes from the Lord. My help is the Lord.

Documentary video (I am very excited about sharing this new video produced by the media department of Literacy & Evangelism International. Though brief, it provides an excellent comprehensive overview of what happens on such a mission. All of the filming was done on the Sierra Leone trip. Enjoy!)

Pictures:
Album 1
Album 2

Journal:
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Part 6
Part 7
Part 8
Part 9
Part 10
Part 11
Part 12
Part 13
Part 14
Part 15
Part 16

To learn more about the work of Literacy & Evangelism International, visit the mission’s website.

You are my shepherd. I will never lack any good thing. My desire is for You alone. Let all earthly pleasures be as nothing to me.

You give me rest as nothing else. The circumstances You put me in are the best for me. Teach me to view them as such. Teach me to thank You for every situation, for each one is from You.

Your guidance is always the best. You lead me in ways that are not too difficult for me. No matter what may be going on along the bank, teach me to keep my eyes on the beautiful stream of blessings that springs forth from You — the Source of all goodness. Though worries and cares of this life threaten to swallow me up, keep me in Your rest. Teach me to sit still and quietly by Your stream — Your Word that brings rest to my troubled soul.

You have restored my soul forever to You. I would be lost without Your mercy. You have restored fellowship with me though I had no desire for it. My relationship with You is wholly due to Your effort.

You lead me in paths of righteousness. You do not leave me to find them on my own. For, I could not. My eyes are blind to the finding of wise ways. Were it not for Your Spirit, Father, I would meander forever in mediocre attempts to please which only puffs up my own pride. Thank you for pleasing Yourself through me. Somehow, You make it work, and I can just rest in You, knowing that You do lead me in all the ways that I should go. Remind me continually that I exist for Your glory alone, and that I ought to view my life as a gift to give back to You in praise.

Though I face many trials and fires and slippery slopes, I will hold on to You. You’ve never let Your children fall to the depths. You’ve always kept them upright. I can trust that You will never change in Your dealings with Your children. Nothing can separate me from Your love. Even death for me is only a gateway to knowing You better. Therefore I will not fear — not the evil within nor the evil without — for it all is subject to You. The knowledge that You are with me assures me that I face nothing alone. When evil knocks at the door, You are here to strengthen me against the temptation. For the many times I wasn’t even aware of evil lurking and You sent it away, I thank you.

Thank You for using Your rod and staff with me. All Your dealings are loving. You discipline those You love and You shepherd those in Your fold. Far rather would I have Your rod than evil’s whip applied to my back. Your chastening is always followed by a restoring embrace. Teach me to remember these things when I am tempted to despair. Your comfort, though it appears not so to those outside Your fold, is worth all sorrow endured.

Your table is laden with good things. The banquet you spread before me is made up of food that never spoils. Even the tiniest morsel savored can sustain me for a day. Never will I lack any necessary nourishment. Teach me to not seek a table elsewhere. Teach me that there is no other lasting food except the food of Your Word. Cause me to daily come to Your table with a hearty appetite. Never let me fast from it. Teach me that I will never live if I do not live by Your table.

Though the war over my soul continues, I know that You have won the fight. Though I am surrounded by enemies. they cannot take away Your table from me. It is not open to them. It is laden with food they know nothing of.

You anoint me with oil. I am Your honored guest. Why You should honor me with such hospitality is too much for me to grasp. All I can do is accept Your gifts and proclaim Your worth. You fill my cup to overflowing. In every aspect of life You sustain me. Your provision is enough for me. It is more than enough. You have given me all I need for life and godliness, so help me live for You alone. Cause me to give you the honor due unto Your name.

Your goodness and mercy are everlasting. Though Your wrath will come to an end, Your mercy endures forever. You delight in showing compassion. Cause me to never forget Who You are. Open my eyes to truth. Help me to see You continually. Thank you for not leaving me to myself. Thank You for continuing the work of sanctification in me. Thank You for not stopping with the work of justification. Thank You for purposing to lead me all the way, even to glorification. Teach me to submit to You in all things. When I am encompassed with seemingly impassable trails, remind me that Your guidance never leads to a dead end. You always have a good plan. Teach me to see You rightly, not tainted by what I see all around me.

You have prepared a home in Heaven for me. Make me more and more joyfully expectant of Your eternal kingdom. Cause me to eagerly anticipate being with You. For there would be no Heaven without You, and Heaven would not be Heaven without You. Teach me continually to delight in You and not in Your gifts, for earthly pleasures pass away, but You will never pass away. Draw me deeper and deeper into Your heart. Show me more and more of Who You are. Thank You for doing so gradually, for if I would see all Your glory at once I would not be able to bear it. Guide me moment by moment into a greater knowledge of You. Teach me to love You more and more as I ought.

Tomorrow starts the last quarter of my year. I will be 23 for only 3 more months.

As I look ahead to turning 24, I think of things that I should do before then…

compile my 2010 annual review
finalize all the reporting/presenting of my Sierra Leone trip and e-mail all links to supporters
make a financial plan for affording graduate school
plan music involvement

establish beneficial morning and evening routines
hone my photography skills in preparation for launching a business
organize my digital life
plod on with the various items on my never-ending to-do list

compile. finalize. make. plan. establish. hone. organize. plod.

Ok, that’s enough to list right now. I’m off for a good night of sleep in anticipation of an exciting full remainder of the week.

Back home in the USA.

I shall endeavor to complete the chronicle of my journey. I have experienced much since I last wrote.

Our taxi drive through Freetown on November 21st was quite an ordeal. The traffic is not what one could call “organized.” Our vehicle sideswiped cars twice, and the police finally stopped us at a round-about. We four white people stayed in the van while our escorts “discussed” the situation with the police. It was a heated discussion, and the driver ended up having his license temporarily taken away to ensure that he would return after delivering us to our destination. Unfortunately, I forgot to look at the side of the van that had been damaged.

We stopped at a market in Freetown. Agnes asked a random lady to be our guide. She did an incredible job helping us find shops and bargain for the goods. It was interesting to find myself becoming more comfortable with bargaining. I ended up finding some gifts for my family and for supporters. We were glad to find genuine Sierra Leonean memorabilia as we hadn’t been able to do so in Bo.

We arrived at the ferry some time before the ride was scheduled, so ate a lunch that the ladies in Bo had packed for us. The owner of the nice restaurant establishment where we ate apparently knew Gregory and treated us all to drinks. I got some great pictures from the second level looking out over the ocean. The greatest shot I got was probably of a man hanging laundry out on the barbed wire to dry. Such a sight is so unknown at home.

A few of us went down to the water. When I saw the beach, I decided to not take off my shoes. Some older boys came up to Carey Jo and me. Though they were trying to be friendly, I could sense that they most likely had the normal expectations of foreigners like us — financial help. I did get a picture of one of them, which I was happy about since I’d hardly gotten any posed shots of Sierra Leonean men.

Some of us got our shoes cleaned by a very amiable shoe-cleaner on the ferry. He was happy about me taking his picture so that I could publicize his excellent service. Too bad I can’t really help him get more business. I spent most of the ferry ride taking pictures of the sunset over Freetown.

We spent the night at the guesthouse we had stayed in the first night in Sierra Leone. After our dinner and impromptu debriefing time, Lori and I talked late into the night in our room. At one point I was sitting on the floor scratching my foot. Finally I realized that I was scratching off skin, and it started to burn. Whether I had gotten a bug bite to provoke the scratching or not is something I’ll never know, but I still have a scar on my foot. The next day it was red and oozing. It’s hard to imagine that my scratching was the only cause of the wound. I like to think I might have had an encounter with a champion bug, but that probably was not the case.

The next morning, we drove to the Banguras home. The road had been leveled, so the ride was very pleasant, lasting 5 minutes instead of the previous 15-20. One of their church members (Sole) and her cousin (Havas) were kind enough to accompany Patty and me as we wanted to get a few more things. Without their help I don’t know how we would have managed. I probably would not have tried to get the inexpensive eye medicine that my dad had requested. At one point we were waiting for Havas to come back as he had agreed to get my money exchanged into smaller bills. We three ladies were approached by a man who promptly started talking with Patty. When we finally decided to leave the area, our escort said there was something not right with him. It was a bit scary.

We rode Okadas to the land that Gregory has purchased to use for his training campus. As resources permit, bricks are being constructed out of cement. The location is surrounded by palm trees which make it beautiful indeed. The stories Gregory told of God’s provision of the land and resources spoke of the amazing power of the Lord to provide.

At the Banguras’ home that day, we worked on the primers. Word control was continued and the meanings of words were clarified. One lady who helps the Banguras knows Mende, so she was able to help with the Mende lessons while Gregory helped with the Themne. Mid-afternoon, we headed back to the guesthouse to retrieve our luggage and check it in at the airport. Our flight was the only one scheduled for the day, and there was only one place to check-in. Never have I been in such a tiny airport. We were treated very well. We got our passports stamped so that we wouldn’t have to take the time for it later. After checking in, we headed back to the Banguras. Agnes had a delicious meal prepared for us. Since the water had been off at the guesthouse, the Banguras allowed those of us who so wished to use their shower. It felt good to be sweat-free for a little bit. In the early evening, we hugged Agnes goodbye and headed off to the airport. I had to leave my swiss army knife with her since I had forgotten to place it in my check-in luggage. Agnes was thrilled. But she was sad to see us go. It was sad to say goodbye, but should the Lord tarry we will meet again.

Security at the airport was airport staff searching our luggage. I saw no high-tech devices anywhere. We spent the next short while in the lounge and enjoyed our last Sierra Leonean cokes. The plane arrived. And then we were among the large crowd heading out the doors to the open night-time air outside. More airport staff at a large table outside searched our baggage again. And then we walked to the plane. It was still ~86 degrees, and I looked up at the Sierra Leonean stars, moon, and sky for the last time.

I have now been back in the West for 5 weeks and have readjusted quite well to reliable electricity and hot running water. Sometimes I still have flashbacks. When I drove again for the second time here, I thought about the motorcycle rides–enjoying the breeze as a relief from the heat, closing my eyes to keep out the dust, and people staring as I rode past. I had to remind myself a couple of times that I no longer had to hold my bag really close in front of me when walking past other people in town and that I could indeed use the water in the sink to clean my retainer and brush my teeth. I realized today that my computer cord is still stained from the weeks of being strung across the dusty cement floor of the training center room. And though I am enjoying all the conveniences of life here, I would leave it all in a second. I would go back to that land far away in a heart-beat if the Lord opened the door and led me through it again.

It was an immense privilege to participate in the proclamation of the gospel in Sierra Leone by preparing materials for the people to learn to read God’s Word. I will forever be grateful for that time.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010 – 8:30 pm – München, Germany

On Tuesday evening as I returned to the hotel from the center, Rachel, who had come to the Esthers gathering, was waiting outside the gate for me. We talked awhile in the restaurant. She is an amazing girl. She loves the Lord and His Word. She loves telling others at her sewing school about Him. She said that she wrote down all I said on Sunday and then told her colleagues about it and if I understood correctly, she said that there were a couple that accepted Christ as a result. I am challenged by her example. She seems to be very proactive in sharing Christ.

Kristianna visited during lunchtime one day. Stephen, her dad, brought her over after I said that it would be fine for her to come visit me. We only talked briefly because I had to go back to work, but she said she would come back later. She did come back with her adopted sister, Dorcas. They are 20 and 16. They were very quiet. I asked them a couple of questions and they asked me if I am married. I shared some of my ideals concerning marriage.

A few times, Christianna (the girl who came with her brother the other day) came to the center to see me. The first time, Agnes came to tell me that she was there. I went to just talk briefly with her. After a few minutes, Agnes came and told me that I was needed inside again. The other times Christianna came I wasn’t available, so I believe it wasn’t God’s will for me to spend time with her.

Almost every evening had more work to be done at the hotel. If there was a good light source at the center, we would have worked later than 6pm there. On Wednesday and Thursday evening evening, a few of the language speakers stayed at the hotel to work late into the night (i.e. 2:30am for one of them). The lighting at their dorm was not adequate for work.

On Saturday morning at 9am we went to the center for the graduation ceremony. Rachel came as she had said she would (and brought me a shirt that she had sewn). The executive secretary of the Bible Society came to give the key address. It was a special ceremony, and the passion of Gregory for the spreading of the Gospel in Sierra Leone was touching.

After the program, Rachel, Kristianna, and Dorcas came back to the hotel with me. I spoke with them in my room, showed pictures of my family, treated them to drinks at the restaurant, and showed them a sampling of my Sierra Leone pictures. They each left me with a picture of themselves, their contact info, and their birthdate. I’m grateful for my sisters in Sierra Leone, and hope to stay in touch and encourage them in the Lord.

In the evening, an awesome storm rolled in. I spent awhile shooting and filming it from the top level of the hotel. I love storms (as long as I feel safe).

On Sunday morning, I spent a short time with Mummy sharing the Gospel with her. I wish that I had endeavored to meet with her earlier so that I would have had more time, but I trust that God is powerful enough to bring her to Himself even if I didn’t have a great deal of time to reason with her.

Rachel came to say goodbye, which was really special for me.

About 9:00am, we left in two vans for Freetown. Mohammed, the owner of the van in which 4 of us rode, is educated and kept us engaged in conversation. He teaches at a school in Bo. He was interested in pictures of the States that Kenyon showed from his laptop.

As we drove, I photographed and filmed villages. Several times, I saw what looked like church services going on, sometimes in straw-topped open air structures. I didn’t have my camera ready and aimed when I saw them. Some things just have to be seen and appreciated without being preserved by a picture.

Monday, November 22, 2010 – 8:43 pm – Brussels airlines – seat 18k

We’re on the way home. Where do I even start to tell about tell about the last week? It’s been amazing. It’s been very full. I’m full of experiences — some of which are easy to describe but some of which cannot be put into words. Last night, we had a kind of impromptu debriefing session as we ate the dinner that Gregory and Agnes sent to the guesthouse for us. I took a video of the setting. The electricity was not very strong. I cut the canned meat with my pocketknife. We talked about the experiences and impressions of these last three weeks.

But I must back-track…

On Monday morning, we continued with the primer construction. I continued with my job of word control. I became known as the word hunter and my computer got the reputation of manufacturing new words. What impressed me was the perseverance of my teammates as I would return the lessons with too many new words highlighted for them to go through and revise. Though there was frustration present, they kept on with the work and teased me about it.

This last week is now somewhat of a blur because it was so full. We finished the health lessons on Tuesday, I believe, and started fully working on the Bible stories on Wednesday.

Wednesday, November 17, 2010 – 7:30 pm

I just came in from a couple of minutes watching the lightning. Now the rain has started. In addition, the mulah is speaking. The loudspeaker must be pointed right at our floor. I can see the mosque from my balcony. Every morning at 5:00, the mulah speaks. It has been 13 years since the last time I heard him. Though it is saddening to hear him because I know so many are caught in the darkness of the muslim religion, he takes me back to a different time and place — that of my childhood. Pakistan. I am reminded of my childhood days in that distant land. Yesterday, we passed a blue-colored goat on our way to the center. He was tied up. Eid is a major holiday for the muslims, and last night they apparently had a feast after a day of fasting. I was reminded of being in our flat in Karachi and hearing a goat being slaughtered down below. For days afterwards, the streets were lined with carcasses and blood. Yesterday I was in a place where I didn’t hear any slaughtering, but I’m sure it happened. All because of the darkness of people’s hearts. Oh that the light would shine there.

Monday, November 15, 2010 – 11:40 pm

Today the Mende team worked on the health and agriculture lessons. I continue to do the word count because it is simplest for one person to do it the whole time since that person grows familiar with the words and the process used to keep track of them. One story I checked today had 42 new words and 6 forms. They are only allowed about 12 new words in the health lessons. One of the team members claims that my computer multiplies the new words , and another dubbed me the “word hunter.” Though trimming down the stories is very tedious work for the team, they persevere. We are frequently reminded that it is difficult for us so that it will be easy for the new reader.

There are four dialects of Mende, so the native speakers are working to make the primer understandable to speakers of them all. We have each of the dialects represented on the team, which makes for interesting debates about which words and spellings to use. It is somewhat confusing for me. I have to pay attention to every little detail to make sure that the finished product is accurate. At times I have to remind those who rattle off revisions to the stories that I do not know Mende. Carey Jo is teaching me a lot. With her experience, she has learned how languages work, and helps the team revise and trim down the stories, which amazes the native speakers.

This afternoon, a girl I met the other day came to the room where we were working. She came with her brother. I still don’t know where they are from, but had gotten the impression at our first meeting that she wasn’t from around here. Since I had to tell her that I have a lot of work the whole day, she said that she would come back on Wednesday. I didn’t feel that I should tell her where I’m staying, but will pray about what to say to with her on Wednesday, though I may not have any time to take away from the work.

Tonight, as Carey Jo, Lori, and I worked in our “office” continuing with the word count on the stories from today, one of the hotel staff dropped by. When he found out about our work, he asked if we could teach him to read Themne. He said he would speak with Gregory about it. It is very touching to see the need for our work right in front of our eyes. I wonder how few people I see here can actually read. I suspect that many can’t.